Monday, June 4, 2018

GIFTS



Everyone of us is fond of receiving Gifts as it is always coming our way with a surprise and from either known or unknown source.  When it is really big gift then it is entirely due to the blessings of the God.  If the Gift is too small we tend to ignore it or palm it off to some one else.  If the Gift is not useful or interesting also it meets with the same fate of being palmed off to some one else as a Gift.

While receiving Gifts is a nice feeling and gives us the excitement and happiness, how about giving gifts.  Are we equally happy, excited and keen to give gifts which are surprising and useful to the recipient?

I am not a great fan of Gifts and do not even give importance to what people give as I am not keen to receive Gifts in the first place. 

I got a T Shirt from my friend K.Devanathan during our CA Final Coaching classes days in 1986 with the caption "When I knew the answers, they changed the questions".   I preserved it for almost 20 years and finally lost sight of it.  Hoping that it is in some corner in my house in Chennai.

The first expensive Gift I received was a tie in Singapore which was gifted to me on my birthday by my friend R.Aravind in 1993.  I have preserved this Tie for 25 years and it is one of my favorite tie that I wear for important occasions. 

I once saw a silk tie in my wardrobe and thought it was gifted by one of my clients.  I called my son Akshay and told him "give this tie to somebody in your friends circle".  He asked me "why?".  I said "I think I got this as a gift from somebody, I have not used this tie so far.  It is better to give it away to someone who will use it".  My son looked at his wife and both of them had a sheepish smile at each other.  My son then told me "Appa I bought this hand woven silk tie for you in Vietnam and I presented this to you just a few months ago".  It was now my turn to look at them with a sheepish look and I said "I am so sorry" and took the tie back.

If the gift is not important or given its due importance it will not stay with you.  If the gift is not liked or is acceptable then it will be put in circulation and surely will be gifted away.

My daughter in law gifted a picture of me and my wife with the autograph of Maestro Ilayaraja on the picture.  This is being preserved and kept right at the bedside by me as this is a very important Gift that I would like to preserve for my life time.

I have just realised that I have more than three dozen pens on my desk which have all been gifted by someone or the other at different stages in life.  None of these pens are of any value to me and none of these pens have ever been used by me.  Some of them have my name inscribed on the surface.  So what?  It matters if the name is inscribed because this becomes non-transferable.  Probably one of the reasons why some of the Pens have remained at my desk.

More than the recipient I think it is the giver of the Gift who has to be choosy, selective and careful in giving the Gift so that it stays with the recipient.  If the Giver is giving some gift which is not relevant for the occasion or fitting the circumstances, then there is every likelihood that the Gift will be passed on to some one else and it could even reach the landfill ultimately.  Plan the Gift well in advance and allocate time for planning and procuring the right gift.  Unfortunately most people decide to buy the gift on the way to the occasion.  It is last minute rush and last minute decision hence the Gift invariably ends up in circulation and is not retained by the recipient.

I believe in "Givers Gain" philosophy and it is important to give without any expectation in return.  Gifts should be given in a responsible manner so that the recipient will use it, value it and cherish it.  It is not about value of the gift but all about the occasion, the use and the thought that goes into selection of the Gift. 

Life is a Gift of God; the body we carry is the Gift of our Parents; the knowledge that we have is the Gift of our Teachers, Mentors and Guides; the Experience that we have gained in our life is the Gift of our Decisions.  We have thus received enough gifts in life let us focus on giving Gifts.  Give Gifts in a responsible and sensible manner so that the recipient will value your Gift.

T.P.Anand
4th June 2018
Dubai, U.A.E.